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The Heart is a Rebel.
Miss that and nothing else makes sense, either about the human condition or what God did to heal its maladies and re-align its focus.
I've driven the interstate across our city for enough years to remember when it felt like a parking lot and required five minutes to go a city block. These days, since the highway has been widened and the lanes increased, we can breeze through what were formerly congested spots at fifty miles per hour. Some motorists, however, choose to go seventy. Where the limit is seventy, they go eighty.
I have not the slightest doubt that if the speed limit were increased to 90, some drivers would exceed it.
The heart is a rebel. It does not like to obey a law or keep a promise or restrain itself.
The tabloid staring at you from the supermarket checkout line names a husband of some Hollywood star known for her beauty. The headline announces that she has caught him in adultery and is suing for divorce.
What, you wonder, is that man doing committing adultery when he is already married to the most luscious dish on the planet? Answer: the heart wants what it wants and does not like to take ‘no' for an answer.
King David, you recall from II Samuel chapter 11, had several wives and no doubt, his choice of any number of other possibilities. Yet, he wanted the wife of Uriah, a warrior who was daily risking his life in David's service. David indulged his lust and ended up securing the slaughter of Uriah in order to protect his public image.
We scratch our heads and wonder why such an otherwise good king would do such a dastardly thing.
Answer: The heart is a rebel.
"So when did you announce your retirement?" I keep getting asked. The answer is: "The day I took this job five years ago."
Once we determined that this was of the Lord, I said to the search committee chairman, Dr. Gail DeBord, "I'll give you three years." He said, "Make it five." And that became the plan.
So, I resigned the day I moved into this office. Gave a five-year notice, you might say. It was most definitely of the Lord. Had I left after three years, we were still in crisis mode here, recovering from the effects of Hurricane Katrina, and the timing would have been terrible.
Now, we're ready. We've done a 12-month re-organizational study of the association under the leadership of seminary Professor Reggie Ogea, and are putting into place an entirely different plan of operation for the Baptist Association of Greater New Orleans.
Ten years ago, Freddie Arnold left the Kingsville Baptist Church of Pineville, LA, where he had been minister of education for 17 years, to become Church Planting Strategist for the Baptist churches of metro New Orleans. That was another God-thing, if there has ever been one.
Monday night, at the Spring meeting of this association and the official retirement send-offs for both Freddie and me, I told the representatives of our churches, "No one could ever have had a finer colleague than Freddie. He has been everything we have needed for this critical time in the life of our churches."
Freddie is multi-talented. I told them, "If you need a sermon, he can preach it. If you need a hymn, he can lead it. If you need a house, he can build it. If your car is in need of repair, he can fix it. And this morning, we found another of his skills. In his early morning walks alongside Lake Pontchartrain, he had picked dewberries, and today, he brought in a cobbler he made with the berries he had picked. Apparently, there is nothing this man cannot do."
Unless it's draw cartoons. (But there's not a lot of call for that!)
On a state or secular college campus, the atheistic professor has complete freedom to spout his religious views without protest from the students or interference from the dean. Let a Christian instructor relate his personal story to inform the students of his worldview so they can better understand where he's coming from, and he's harassed and soon out of a job.
At a convocation of students on the average campus, "freedom of speech" and the First Amendment are championed. Let a student stand and own up to being a follower of Jesus Christ who attempts to live by the Bible, and he/she is hooted down.
Ironic, isn't it, the hostility that those of a secular bent have toward belief in Jesus Christ.
It's more than just a prejudice, however. It's a full-blown hatred.
That hatred is born of a fear of Jesus.
If you have ever read the gospels and wondered how in the world things in that remote day came to the point where right-thinking people moved to arrest and crucify the Lord Jesus Christ, He who never lifted a finger against a human on the planet, the Man of Peace, then take a look around you.
Human nature hasn't changed in the last 2,000 years.
Look at the way militant gays feel threatened by a Baptist church where the people inside are seeking to live as Jesus did and by His teachings. The believers inside that congregation would never hurt a fly, yet they are vilified as the enemy by the protestors outside who hurl profanity and insults in their direction.
They hate the church for the same reason the religious leaders of the first century opposed Jesus: they fear righteousness.
That surprises a lot of Christians.
I'll write an article for the website on preachers who get hurt by thoughtless church leaders or are themselves the perpetrators of wrong against church members, and the comments arrive in droves. Everyone has a story. There is so much pain in the church today.
No one can hurt us like a family member can. Since a church is a family of believers, we become vulnerable to injury as a result of our close dealings with each other.
A friend wrote, "I just read (in your blog) about mistakes preachers make. May I share a story with you?"
She and her husband were members of a church in another state. A casual, impromptu conversation with the leader of the church's Bible-drillers was misunderstood, then blown all out of proportion and may have resulted in a death. Here is her story, which I have edited for clarity and to cushion her from identification.
"We were chatting in the bathroom at church. I thanked the woman for her work in teaching the children the way to use their Bibles. She commented that she had only one child in her program at that moment. She had sent letters home with the Sunday School children encouraging the parents to get their kids in the program, but with pitiful results.
"The pastor's wife happened to be in another part of the ladies' room and overheard the conversation. Apparently, she read more into it than was intended. Later that week, my husband received a nasty letter from the preacher.
An article in Saturday's religion page of the Chattanooga Free Press--I read it over lunch driving home from a conference in Ridgecrest North Carolina--spoke of the decline in numbers our (Southern Baptist) denomination is experiencing. The statistics indicate we are baptizing fewer than last year, which continues a downward trend of the last decade or so. We count fewer members of our churches, although, again, the negative numbers are not drastic.
Not yet anyway.
Now is the time to act, our leaders are saying. Every elected and appointed executive of our denomination pulls his teams together and sends them searching for programs and methods to spur a new round of ministry and growth in our churches.
I have two thoughts on that subject. These are not the final answer on anything, I regret to say, but surely these two points must provide part of the answer.
One: times of decline in a church are periods when most churches do precisely the opposite of what they should be doing. They begin looking for ways to cut back on staff and lop off expenses. Training programs for staff are among the first to go and advertising in the community is quickly seen as unneeded.
Counterproductive. Most destructive.
The very opposite of what a church should do.
I caught Pastor Mike on the drive back from Birmingham where he'd been performing a wedding. "Your dog is fine," I said over the phone. "But there's one thing."
I'd been checking on his dog -- a full member of the Miller family, if I'm any judge -- while my pastor and his family were out of town for 36 hours. I'd looked in on her Friday evening on my way to a revival meeting where I was the preacher, and then let her in the house that night on my way home. Saturday morning, I'd let her outside for a bit -- it looked like rain, so she would stay inside today -- and put food in her bowl. I let her visit the back yard again at noon and one final time before leaving for the evening revival service. She's a lovely dog (golden retriever, I think) and soaked up all the attention I gave her.
"The problem," I told Pastor Mike, "is that the food I put out for her this morning is untouched." He sighed, "I know. She's depressed." He added that she had been depressed the last few days while Mike's wife Terri has been in another state with their oldest son who was having surgery. Mike said, "It's really Terri's dog and they're missing each other."
The dog is depressed and so doesn't eat. How human is that?
I've never had a house-dog, so the subtleties of canine ownership eludes me. My sister Carolyn, however, knows all there is to know on the subject.
A number of years back, I was visiting senior adults with one of our deacons. As we approached one house in particular, he said, "Be careful of the dog, Pastor. He's pretty ferocious."
As we walked through the gate into the yard, I spotted a skinny little mutt cowering under a shrub. Surely that couldn't be the monster he warned me about.
Inside, the lady of the house said, "Did you see my dog outside? The poor thing got all his hair cut off and he just hasn't felt good about himself ever since."
So humanlike.
Sometimes when I'm drawing children, in order to provoke a smile, I'll ask, "Are you married?" and when they say, "No," I ask, "Why not?" The conversations are often funny.
Revelation 3:20 may well be the most-quoted Bible verse in today's churches. Jesus said, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and dine with him and he with me."
Some teachers/preachers make much of the fact that the passage in which it is found was addressed to a church (Laodicea in Asia Minor) and not to an unsaved individual. If context is everything -- and I do not believe it is; it's much but not everything -- then, that alone should warn us off using Revelation 3:20 in an evangelistic situation.
The fact is evangelism was precisely what was needed in that Laodicean church. Undoubtedly, some of those church leaders needed saving! If that's the case, then this fascinating verse was meant exactly for the purpose for which we use it today.
All that aside (I really do not intend or wish to debate that point), there are three wonderful surprises in this verse which I'd like to call to your attention:
One: There is a surprise about Jesus. Look how willing He is to bless us. He has done everything necessary for our eternal life and salvation and forgiveness and usefulness in the Kingdom, and has gone the extra mile in bringing it right to our doorstep! In fact, He does everything to get us into Heaven except one thing: He will not force it on us.
Remember the old saw about "where does the 600 pound gorilla go?" (the answer being, "Anywhere he wants to.") Well, you would think that would also be the answer to the question "Where does the Lord of Heaven and Earth go?" But it isn't. There is one place He will not go without an invitation: into the human heart.
One --
Charlie Dale, pastor at New Orleans' Grace Baptist Church, has just sent a post-Easter message to everyone on his e-mailing list with the following:
"The church is full of hypocrites! It must be true because I've heard it all my life. Well, for those who decry the church being filled with hypocrites, I have good advice for you. Go to church on the Sunday after Easter. The Sunday after Easter is the lowest attended Sunday all year. The church won't be full of hypocrites because the church won't be full of anybody. If the past is any indication, our own church building will be one-quarter full. This is your opportunity to fill the church with genuine, authentic, pure-in-heart people like yourself; therefore, you'll out-number the rest of us hypocrites! We'll even read Christ's own preaching against hypocrisy from Matthew 6:1-18 this Sunday."
Charlie ends with this: "This opportunity only comes once a year. Don't waste it." He adds this post-script: "Note to hypocrites: Don't worry. We know that we're still in charge."
Good stuff, Charlie. One thing you can be assured of: those who show up this Sunday will possess a good sense of humor!
Two --
Recently a friend said, "Tell me what to do, Joe. Sometimes in the introduction of my sermon, I get so carried away with what I'm going to preach, that I end up preaching the entire thing right then. Instead of reading my text and going about it in an orderly way, I dump the whole thing on them up front."
I smiled and said, "Well, not to devastate you all in one blow, but the answer to your problem is called ‘preparation.'"
I hastened to add that I was talking about a certain kind of preparation. "When you get your sermon planned out, then take a walk and preach it to yourself. I cannot tell you how many times preaching my sermon out loud in advance has saved me from many an error."
Preach it not one time, but numerous times before Sunday, I suggested.
In relating that to my pastor friend, my mind went back to over 30 years ago when I made that discovery. Until then, I had written out my sermons the same way a person might pen an essay or even this type of article. That is, I dealt with the message as though it were all about writing and not about speaking. And then I found Clyde Fant's book "Preaching for Today." It changed everything.
Three --
I'm not going to identify the preacher to spare him possible embarrassment, but knowing him, he'd probably enjoy the notoriety. He shared this with a group of us one day ago and I've smiled about it ever since.
A few of us preachers were confessing mistakes we'd made in the pulpit. During a pause, he said, "Well, I once told the congregation to turn to some scripture, something like Luke chapter 5, verse 31. And when I got there, I saw it was not the text I had in mind. But for the life of me, I couldn't find my note with the correct text. So, I just read that verse to them and then preached it!"
The other pastors howled. I suppose we all could just see ourselves doing that. Or maybe we took pleasure in knowing that with all the dumb things we've done, we never did that!
The preacher said, "When it was over, the people said it was one of my most spirit-filled messages ever."
That, I suggest, is not a very good testimonial for sermon preparation.
I thought of something Bill Nimmons said. At the time he was the associate pastor of Starkville, Mississippi's First Baptist Church, serving under Pastor D. C. Applegate, a lovely man of God with multiple health problems. Bill had unfortunately learned to expect those last-minute phone calls informing he that he would need to fill in for the pastor. That's what happened this particular Sunday.
The call had come during breakfast that Sunday morning, leaving Bill almost no time to prepare. However, God took over, everyone agreed, and the sermon was excellent, the service a blessing, and a number of people responded to the invitation. Just before the benediction, the chairman of deacons announced, "This afternoon, Bill will have time to prepare tonight's sermon. So, this morning, we saw what God can do. Come back tonight, and we'll see what Bill can do!!"
It helps to have a sense of humor about church work.
During the Great Depression, in an attempt to put people to work and spur recovery, FDR and Congress formed the Works Progress Administration (WPA). Interestingly, the WPA did not just recruit laborers and skilled craftsmen, but assembled artists and writers and put them to work. (Students of politics will recall that FDR's right-hand man, Harry Hopkins, served as the administrator of the WPA.)
Artists painted murals in post offices all over America, where they can still be seen and enjoyed. Writers collected the stories and histories of communities across the country, most being recorded for the first time. These remain invaluable treasures today. One of the best of these was written about our city.
"New Orleans City Guide: 1938" is a fun read for anyone who knows and loves the Crescent City. First published, obviously, in 1938, it was reprinted in 1952 and 1983. The present reprint (2009) comes from Garrett County Press (http://www.gcpress.com). This book has been called the "masterpiece of the whole (WPA) series." I bought it at Sams Club for $12.32, a bargain.
I've been trying to assemble a representative collection of books on New Orleans for our associational office. It occurs to me that new staffers coming to work here will enjoy reading them and learning the history and culture of the community where God has sent them. They do not have to approve it or even like it, but they need to know it.
A few things from the book you might find interesting....
Bear in mind the year 1718 is the official founding date for New Orleans. "The earliest direct reference to a house of worship in the city is in the account of Father Charlevoix, who, when visiting New Orleans in 1721, found only ‘a hundred houses, and half a miserable warehouse, where Our Lord is worshipped.'"
Gradually the various Catholic orders sent in priests and nuns and got things going. The Jesuits arrived in 1837, bringing with them a number of educational institutions, including Loyola University.
"We are not ignorant of his devices," Paul says of the one variously called in scripture as destroyer, tempter, and adversary (II Corinthians 2:11). We know that one of his favorite tampering grounds is the memories of believers.
Here are eight ways I've learned over a lengthy ministry that Satan uses to sabotage Christian influence and poison Christian behavior by messing with the remembering/forgetting mechanism of the Lord's people... .
One: We remember the "good" from the bad, old life.
In the wilderness, Israel forgot the slavery and cruelties from their Egyptian captors and recalled only the few pleasures. "We remember the fish, the melons, cucumbers, leeks, onions and garlic," they said in Numbers 11:5.
Vance Havner used to castigate Israel for their bellyaching and shallow cravings. "Melons -- they are 95 percent water! Cucumbers -- 12 inches of indigestion! And the onions and garlic -- well, they speak for themselves!"
After we have come to Christ and been forgiven for the past, then to return to that trash heap and pick through the refuse to savor some choice morsels -- not a good thing. "As a dog returns to its own vomit, so a fool repeats his folly" (Proverbs 26:11). That proverb was cited by the Apostle Peter in the New Testament concerning people who drop back into their sinful ways. "It has happened to them according to the true proverb, ‘a dog returns to its own vomit,' and ‘a sow, having washed, to her wallowing in the mire' (II Peter 2:22)."
Two: We forget the pain of the old life.
April 17-19, 2009 -- Revival at First Baptist Church of Belle Chasse below New Orleans. Sam Gentry is pastor. 7 pm at night and 10:30 am Sunday.
April 22-25 -- Ridgecrest Conference Center in North Carolina -- Leading conferences (and drawing people!) at the bi-ennial National Assn of Southern Baptist Secretaries Wednesday thru Saturday morning.
Monday, April 27 -- Spring meeting of our association -- my official retirement -- meeting at First Baptist Church of New Orleans on Canal Blvd at 7 pm. You're invited.
May 3-6 -- Revival at North Greenwood Baptist Church in Greenwood, Mississippi. Noon services each weekday and 7 pm nightly. Jim Phillips is the pastor.
Tuesday, May 12 -- First Baptist Church, Brandon, MS speaking to senior adults, 10:30 am and 6 pm.
Wednesday/Thursday, May 13-14 -- NOAH Transition meeting at BAGNO.
Wednesday from 5 to 8 pm, drawing for Lakeview Baptist Church for the outdoor market fling on Harrison Avenue
Friday/Saturday, May 15-16, annual retreat for Directors of Missions in Louisiana. Springfield, LA.
Sunday, May 17, preaching at FBC Springfield in the morning service.
Monday, May 25 until Saturday morning, May 30, drawing missionaries and their families in Richmond.
Sunday, May 31 -- morning services of Lake Ridge Baptist Church, Woodbridge, Virginia
Week of June 21 -- Southern Baptist Convention, Louisville, KY. I'll be drawing for Baptist Press.
Friday/Saturday, June 26-27 -- children's retreat for FBC Double Springs, AL at Camp Lee, Anniston, AL
September 12, Saturday, Ridgecrest on the River, NOBTS -- conferences all day
September 26-27 (Sat/Sun) drawing and preaching for FBC Inman, SC. Paul Moore, pastor.
October 4-7, (Sun-Wed) revival at FBC Leakesville, MS. Philip Price is pastor.
November 6-7 (Fri/Sat) senior adult retreat for Annistown Road Baptist Church, Atlanta, held at Toccoa GA conference Center. My buddy Joel Davis is their senior adult leader.
November 29 (Sunday night) FBC Brandon MS
On the surface, this may appear to be a full schedule. But look more closely and you'll see there's lots of white space left on the calendar. So, there's plenty of time to be working on the three books I'm trying to write (subjects: prayer, leadership, and fellowship). In the meantime, if your pastor needs a revival preacher, Bible teacher, prayer conference leader, deacon retreat speaker, banquet speaker/entertainer/motivator, or a janitor -- one who mixes cartoons throughout all these -- encourage him to call me!
I'll appreciate your prayers that the Lord will use me to strengthen these churches, encourage these pastors, and reach people for Jesus.
Some of the richest events in my life have been happenings, moments that God in Heaven clearly planned but which on this end seemed spontaneous and proved to be lastingly rewarding.
Last Wednesday, I got word the mother of a friend had died and the funeral would be Saturday afternoon in Gadsden, Alabama. Larry Black, the long-time (now retired) minister of music at the First Baptist Church of Jackson, MS, and I became colleagues on that staff nearly 40 years ago and have remained friends ever since. I served in Jackson only 3 years before departing to pastor, but Larry stayed more than three decades. In the process he earned a reputation as the absolute finest worship leader in the country, period. I'm not alone in that estimation. He built an incredible music ministry in that church and worked with some of America's greatest preachers in revivals and crusades.
Since we are about the same age, and both Alabama boys with similar backgrounds, over the years Larry and I used every opportunity to visit and talk about our raising and our parents and our kids. In seminary, he served the great Mid-City Baptist Church in New Orleans under Pastor Paul Driscoll, and developed a love for this town and an addiction to certain of its foods.
I needed to attend this funeral. Margaret and Neil agreed.
I was surprised how deeply Mike's visit and prayer touched me.
I had told our church staff that Margaret would be having foot surgery the following day and that they should not bother coming by the hospital. And yet, the next morning, there he was--Mike Dupont, our student minister, come to pray for his pastor-and-wife on his assigned day to make the hospital rounds.
Margaret had been prepped for surgery and we were idling away the time, waiting for the OR people to come for her. In walked Mike. He gave Margaret a hug--she thought of him as one of her sons--and we chatted. Then he led us in prayer and left.
A warmth passed over me, a feeling of being loved and ministered to.
This certainly was not the first time I'd been in the hospital and visited by a church member or a minister. As a veteran of several surgeries, both serious and minor, beginning at the age of 9, I have known my share of hospitalizations and been ministered to on numerous occasions by clergy and laity alike. But this was special, for reasons I cannot tell you.
That was some six or seven years ago, and I remember Mike's visit like it was this morning.
If I were a betting man, I'd wager that I'm not alone in being surprised at how a hospital visit and prayer could bless a minister. My strong hunch is that most church members have never given a thought to the pastor needing a personal visit and prayer or some similar touch.
Now, having said that, we need to try to clarify something.
Not every pastor needs a church member to walk in this morning and lead him in prayer.
We're all different and all in a state of flux, of change, of growth and movement and transition. What works today doesn't necessarily work tomorrow. What I crave today might be irrelevant in a week.
--To the motorcyclist on the interstate this morning, I'd like to say: "Friend, you need to understand a law of physics. The faster you go, the smaller you become and the more invisible you appear to the other motorists."
People who ride these killer machines -- and some are dear friends and brothers in the ministry -- do so for the freedom, the exhilaration of the fresh air and the open road, and yes, let's admit it, the sensation of speed. Nothing has the pick-up of a Harley on a highway. That's what makes them doubly dangerous.
In the first place, other drivers don't see you as a matter of routine. They're watching for other cars and trucks, not for a bicycle-on-steroids, and that's why even good and faithful motorists have sometimes inadvertently pulled into the path of an oncoming motorcycle. Secondly, if you increase your speed to something horrendous -- this morning, the traffic was moving at 65 to 70 mph and the motorcycle had to have been doing 90 -- I can almost guarantee you that no motorist will notice you until you are on top of them. That's why every week in this city -- every blessed week! -- we have people killed on motorcycles.
--to the pastor who has lost his vision for his community, I'd like to say: "Dear brother, either resign or ask God to give you a new vision for the people inside and around your church."
The stark headline -- in large red letters against a black background -- blaring at the reader from the front of the April 13 Newsweek announces "The Decline and Fall of Christian America" by Jon Meacham, the editor.
The first thing Meacham admits in his personal column, however, is that the title is overblown. They're selling magazines. Meacham says, "Christianity is not depleted or dying; it remains a vibrant force in the lives of billions."
So, what happened?
Someone took a poll and found that fewer people are calling themselves Christians than a few years back and more Americans say their religion is "nothing at all." Publishing houses quickly went into overdrive churning out books announcing the failure of Jesus Christ's mission. The religion page of Saturday's Times-Picayune depicts a book titled "Nothing: Something to Believe In."
Give me a break.
I'm by this the way I am about the television news a couple of days ago describing the panic in America as a result of a) Obama's election and b) the increase in murder/suicides by crazies, both of which, we're told, have resulted in a rush to buy more guns and stock up on ammunition.
Talk about over-reacting.
How does this look for a sermon on prayer? Text: "But certainly God has heard me; He has attended to the voice of my prayer. Blessed be God, who has not turned away my prayer, nor His mercy from me" (Psalm 66:19-20).
And here are some possible points:
HOW DEAR
HOW NEAR
HOW CLEAR
HOW QUEER
Still with me? "How dear" is our God who would deign to hear from people such as you and I, sinners all. Somewhere I recall hearing of some pagan who for the first time learned about the God revealed in Scriptures. He exclaimed, "There! I always told you there had to be a god like that!"
"How near" is our God to us when we pray. He is near to the brokenhearted (Psa. 34:18) and near to all who call upon Him (Psa. 145:18). We are wise to call upon Him when He is near (Isa. 55:6). God says, "Am I a God who is near? And not a God far off (Jeremiah 23:23)?"
"How clear" is the Scripture's teachings on this. "It will also come to pass that before they call, I will answer, and while they are still speaking, I will hear" (Isa. 65:24). "You have not because you ask not" (James 4:3). "Ask and you shall receive" (Matthew 7:7). What could be clearer?
"How queer" it is that even with all these insights and promises and a Lord so great, so loving and so available, we pray so little, so poorly, and so ineffectively.
The Lord Jesus said, "Until now you have asked for nothing in my name. Ask and you will receive that your joy may be made full" (John 16:24).
I'm struck by Paul's tribute to Stephanas in I Corinthians 16. Along with his circle of family and friends, this brother in the Lord did three things earning him an "honorable mention" in Holy Scripture---
1. Stephanas and his circle of family and friends were addicted to ministry. That's quite a tribute. In our day, when people see needs, they do as the Lord's disciples did in the early part of John 9 and get into debates over who is to blame. But there are among us a few who have no time for such pointless dilly-dallying. They jump in to see what they can do to alleviate the situation.
2. Stephanas and his gang filled the cracks of service. Paul says, "They completed what was lacking on your part." It would have been so easy for Stephanas to become angry over dropped commitments and failed promises. But he didn't. When the pledges of support from Corinth did not arrive as promised, Stephanas stepped in and ministered to Paul in whatever ways he required. (There's no way to know, but I'm betting Paul needed some cash!)
3. As a result, Paul says, "they refreshed my spirit." (I Corinthians 16:18) All around the great apostle were people who were bleeding him dry -- draining his spirit, eroding his strength, exhausting his patience. Then, along comes Stephanas and his friends. When they depart, Paul is recharged, renewed, refreshed, and ready to go again.
That's the kind of person I want to be. "Lord, make me a refresher. I want to be one who finds the brother in the ditch or sprawled along the wayside where life has felled him, and stands him on his feet."
I like finding signs with misprints. Often these are the results of a miscommunication between the person who orders it and the one who prints it. For instance, a sign in front of a local neighborhood center announced: "A DULT DANCE -- Thursday 7 pm." It was repeated just like that on the other side.
I read that and wondered, "What is a dult? And why are they invited to the dance and no one else?"
In a book, this misprint gave me a chuckle: "They are up there hugging one anther." Someone had written underneath, "I'll hug an anther. Show me one."
That all brings to mind a famous bit of graffiti observed on a New York subway. Someone had scrawled, "I love grils." Underneath, another person had written: "Girls." And under that, a third person had penned: "But what about us grils?"
Our firstborn son Neil was ordained as a deacon Sunday night at the First Baptist Church of Kenner. He and five others "are already deacons," said Pastor Mike Miller. "We're only recognizing the reality of who these men are -- servants in every way."
Unbeknownst to Neil, some of our family came in for the occasion. One day last week, I told him, "I need two times with you Saturday---at 3:30 and at 7 o'clock. I need you to go somewhere with me." He said, "Dad! That's the Final Four weekend! I have these games to watch." I laughed, "Tough." And then assured him he wouldn't miss much of them.
Saturday at 3:30, he and I drove toward the airport, only 5 minutes from his house. He said, "Who do I know who is flying in for this?" Then, when he saw I was pulling into the departure area, he said, "You're sending me somewhere." Earlier, he guessed we were renting him a convertible since the weather was so stupendous. (I might have if I'd thought of it!)
As we cruised along slowly in front of the terminal, he said, "There's Marty!" (His brother) He jumped out and they bear-hugged. A precious moment.
At 7 o'clock that night, he (per instructions) drove to my house in his van. I said, "Let's go downtown." Since we have never ever met any incoming visitors downtown -- they either drive in or fly in -- he had no clue what we were doing. When I said, "Turn left on Loyola," he said, "Okay, who do I know who would come to see us on Greyhound?" I said, "Or Amtrak." (The same building offers both bus and train service.)
We parked in the loading zone and I said, "I'll stay with the van. Go inside and walk around until you see someone you know." A few minutes later, he exited carrying luggage, and was followed by my two sisters, Patricia Phelps and Carolyn Lampman and Trish's daughter Deanna. A great surprise. Neil told them, "I am so honored you would do this for me."
We wrote this caption on a poster Wednesday at our monthly ministers' meeting. Before soliciting their suggestions on what to tell our congregations concerning the economic situation our country is facing, I posed a different question to them.
"How many of your churches are hurting financially, how many are holding their own, and how many are doing better this year than last?"
Interestingly, only four pastors indicated their congregational giving was down, a larger number -- perhaps ten -- said their giving was about the same, and six indicated their contributions are higher than last year.
I was surprised. The church contributions to the association for both February and March are down considerably except for a substantial gift from one church in February that offset the otherwise negative numbers. My hunch was that, just as we hear of denominational agencies cutting back on expenses as a result of declining revenues, at the grass roots level our church incomes are suffering and are thus the ultimate culprit.
The fact that we are doing well (in the local churches) might be an anomaly for Louisiana, since we constantly hear that this state is not suffering the declines in employment or personal income other states are facing. Much of this is due to the rebuilding boom in the New Orleans area, a phenomenon associated with post-Hurricane Katrina life.
I hate it when a call like this comes in. A young man whom I wed to his fiancée some years ago has died suddenly. The family says he wasn't going to church and didn't have a pastor, but since I performed the ceremony, would I be available for the funeral? I would. And I'll do my best, for them and for the Lord. But I hate this sort of thing.
I hate anyone dying, but especially young people. I hate anyone not going to church, but especially young couples. I hate funerals, but especially funerals for unprepared people of whom I know so little.
But as much as I hate it, I'll do my best because of the call of God on my life.
I hate it when a church member decides to oppose her pastor just because she has chosen not to like him.
She criticized him for not coming to see her in the hospital as much as she felt he should. She looked him in the eye and said, "You have not done one positive thing for our church." She was wrong, of course. Way wrong.
I said to the pastor, "Here's what you can say to her. The former pastor (that would be me) says when he was your minister, he visited you regularly in the hospital and called on your family members numerous times -- and you still disliked him and opposed him. So, apparently, it doesn't really matter whether I visit you or not."
But I hate that. I hate the way people take out their bad mental health on the one person God sends to bless them, particularly when he is one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet.
Wednesday at lunch, someone asked a veteran pastor, "What does it take to stay at a church like yours for many years?" He didn't hesitate. "The skin of a rhino."
My grandson Grant is nearing 15 years of age and I love him dearly. However, it will not surprise readers who are grandparents that I miss the Grant who was the little boy of two or three or four. I was pastoring the First Baptist Church of Kenner and, with his parents' permission, would often spend one afternoon a week with him. We would have lunch at McDonald's -- he was enamored with Ronald McDonald -- and then visit the Audubon Zoo or a park to feed the ducks or a playground somewhere.
One day, I wrote this little poem about our relationship, from Grant's perspective---
Title: "We're very good friends, my grandpa and I."
He tells me long stories
Of bad guys and thieves,
Of boys Joe and Jason
Who live in my trees.
He takes me to McDonald's
At least once a week.
He reads his magazine,
We play hide and seek.
We love to feed the ducks
And sea gulls and squirrels.
We throw them bread and popcorn
--just us guys, no girls.
He tells me how much he loves me;
I say I love you more.
I love you all the way to Alabama.
He loves me to Singapore.
(This seems to have been inspired by a child's book of a similar title. I should have gone further with the poem, and as I recall, that was the original plan. But this is all there is of it.)
In his commentary on James, Kent Hughes tells of an experience Howard Hendricks had while speaking at a Sunday School convention. (Hendricks taught Christian Education at Dallas Theological Seminary for over 40 years; he's one of the Lord's true originals.)
Vision doesn't last and must constantly be renewed....
Over three centuries ago, a ship filled with travelers landed on the Northeast coast of America. In their first year, they established a town site. The second year, they elected a government. In the third year, the town government announced plans to build a road five miles westward into the wilderness. In the fourth year, the citizens tried to impeach their elected leaders because building a road into the wilderness was a waste of public funds. Who needed to go there anyway?
Here we have people with the vision to see 3,000 miles across an ocean and overcome great obstacles, but within a short time, they could not see five miles out of town. They had lost their pioneering spirit.
Leadership is all about vision and the ability to convey it to others....
John Sculley was running Pepsi when Apple Computer's Steve Jobs invited him to move to California in order to manage his struggling company. Sculley was faced with a real dilemma. Then Steve Jobs said, "John, do you want to spend the rest of your life selling sugared water or do you want to change the world?" Sculley says, "That knocked the wind out of me."
Vision has a way of doing that.
Leadership knows the inspirational value of a great story....
As of last Saturday, I am the age of Ronald Reagan when he was elected president the first time. With him as my role model, I now have time for another career.
Someone asked this morning if I intend to enter politics. I said, "No. The movies."
Two days before me, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and movie actor James Caan also reached the advanced age of 69. They look better and younger than me because they color their hair.
I'm considering going into denial about future birthdays. I may resort to the Greer Garson line: "Age is just a number and mine is unlisted."
Got time for some stuff?
(In a conference, a friend, observing me dropping in an occasional humorous line, accused me of shallowness. I responded, "Everyone of those quips is profound. But most people don't take the time to study them. That's their problem, not mine." That's not entirely true, but I like to pretend it is!)
This fellow said their family used to have a "mobile" outhouse. In the summer it was 65 steps and in the winter it was a mile-and-a-half.
I had a garage sale. In the very first hour I sold $849 worth of stuff---for 39 dollars and 50 cents.
Two old men were talking. One said, "I'm going to live to be 120." The other said, "I'm gonna miss you."