| « My Preaching Schedule --- Autumn, 2008 | MAIN | The Best Reason for the Church to Stay Out of Politics » |
October 17, 2008
Help Me Out Here
I've mentioned that once May 1 rolls around and I find myself unemployed (aka, "retired"), I plan to finish writing three books I've been working on the last year or two. One of them has to do with Christian fellowship.
Or to be more exact, the lack of it in our churches, the need for it, and how to get it.
On the home page for this website, you can click on a long series of articles on prayer and leadership and Romans, but so far we've not collected the numerous writings that are scattered throughout on the subject of Christian fellowship. As with so much of what I write, it's rather random and unorganized and happened to be what was on my mind at the moment.
To turn it into a book, that'll have to change, and it will. Recently, however, I've actually gone back over the last several years and looked at each article to pick out the ones dealing with fellowship in the church. I might have missed some, but here is what I found:
July 27, 2004 -- "What Every Pastor Needs: A Good Buddy"
May 23, 2008 -- "Why We Came Today"
May 27, 2008 -- "Where Everybody Knows Your Name"
May 31, 2008 -- "The Greatest Church Growth Principle"
June 20, 2008 -- "What Fellowship Looks Like"
June 20, 2008 -- "The Most Basic Element is ‘Hanging Out Together'"
June 21, 2008 -- "So Easily Corrupted"
June 24, 2008 -- "Is It Possible to have Fellowshp in the Worship Service?"
June 25, 2008 -- "Learning to Support Our Leaders"
June 26, 2008 -- "What to do About Shy People"
July 2, 2008 -- "Case Study in Shy People"
October, 2008 -- "Number One Failure of 90 Percent of Pastors"
Two things are obvious here.
One, I was on a roll over a few weeks in May and June and turned out a number of articles. Two, with this subject we can go in a hundred directions. You'll notice we're mixing in stuff on pastors and their need for close friends in the ministry. That's fellowship, too.
Everyone has his story about fellowship in the church (or the lack of it). That's what I'm asking for here. Tell us your story.
If it's short, leave it as a comment at the end of this article. If it's lengthy, send it directly to me: joe@joemckeever.com. I'll put it in the file and use it later, or perhaps build a completely new article around it.
My friend Jack Smith up in Oak Grove, Louisiana, has said ten times if he said it once in my hearing, "What we had at Emmanuel Baptist Church in Greenville, Mississippi, in the late 60's and early 70's was something special." He will go on to say he has lived in several towns since then and belonged to a number of churches but has never found again what we had then.
I know what it is, Jack.
It was the fellowship.
It wasn't the preaching. I was green. Lord, how green I was. But I was having the time of my life, the Lord was blessing, we were seeing people come into the fellowship and exciting things were happening. We were studying the word, we were doing some work, and we were having worship. But none of these were any more special than what you would find in hundreds of other churches our size. What distinguished Emmanuel during that time was the fellowship within the congregation.
Okay, it's time to define that. What exactly are we getting at here?
Help me. Maybe you have a good way of defining fellowship.
Fellowship seems to be the life force of the people as they interact with one another. They love the Lord and love one another and what's more, they actually like one another. That's part of it, but not all.
Find a church with great fellowship and you'll find it active in doing the Lord's work. Fellowship is never static. There's no fellowship in a graveyard.
Then--a major, major element in true fellowship--is that when new people join the group, the members open their arms and welcome them royally.
We've all seen groups where the members loved each other, but they froze everyone else out. That is a clique. It's exclusive. But a koinonia--a fellowship in the truest sense--is inclusive. It welcomes the stranger into its midst.
God told Israel, "Love your neighbor as yourself." (Lev. 19:18) "The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born. Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt." (Lev. 19:34)
That's the idea.
Now, help me out please. Tell me the stories or incidents or definitions that come to mind on the subject of fellowship.
| « My Preaching Schedule --- Autumn, 2008 | MAIN | The Best Reason for the Church to Stay Out of Politics » |
God told Israel, "Love your neighbor as yourself." (Lev. 19:18) "The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born. Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt." (Lev. 19:34)
Arrange your life (time, finances and heart)to have the freedom to act when the spirit calls you to love (bear burdens, celebrate with others, have hospitality in your home and serve others). It's a choice we make every day whether we are intentional about it or not. If your heart is consummed by earthly things, your time is short and your money gone how can you show your love for others? I have had a few fellowship mentors in my life and I think I had a great treasure.
Posted by: Kellie at October 17, 2008 02:08 PMchrist said byn this shall all men know that you are my disciple, if youm have love one for another.
fellowship of those with common beliefs and a common goal is sweet and precious. And it shows the lost that Christ can cause people to change, and to love those, they once despised.
For true fellowship to happen, members must accept one another, including newcomers. I once invited 16 young adults of a church I pastored to my house for fellowship. At a break in the action, I asked what the church could do to become more attractive to their age group (20's &30's). NO mention of music or worship styles. All agreed they wanted to feel accepted and valued by the older members.
In that church - fairly small - as well as other larger churches, I repeatedly found older members had no clue when I mentioned the name of a younger, faithful and energetic member. "Who are they?" was my almost inevitable answer.
Fellowship must begin in getting to know and share life among the membership. They gotta get outa the beaten paths!
Posted by: Perry Lassiter at October 20, 2008 04:55 AMJoe,
Fellowship! That’s what I remember about the Singles group at First Baptist in Jackson, MS when you and Margaret were there in 1972-3. We did something every day of the week together. Sunday we had Sunday School and worship in the morning and Discipleship and worship in the evening. After the evening service someone opened their home for a get-together or we all went out to eat at the same restaurant. Monday we had fun and games in the Youth Center followed by a devotional. It was a great place to bring our unchurched friends. Tuesdays we went out and shared Jesus with others. Wednesday we had supper and midweek service or choir. Thursdays we gathered at Miss Briscoe’s for a wonderful time of prayer. Either on Friday or Saturday someone would think up some kind of party and fellowship and invite everyone. It was so wonderful to be able to get to know our contemporaries in a group setting. We laughed, we shared our hearts, we cried, we prayed, and some of us fell in love. Ken and I have never been in any other church where the “fellowship” was so strong. We definitely need more fellowship today!
Carolyn Adams Switzer
No answers, just question a to consider.
How does one balance "deeper friendships" within the church and becoming a clique. There seems to be situations where all the relationships in the church are quite shallow while there are others where a new person comes in and then realizes that they will never really be on the inside of this group because they have known and loved each other for so long. Either way, their own need for fellowship is being impeded.
Posted by: Charlie Dale at October 21, 2008 01:51 PMJoe, remember the fellowship at FBC Columbus. Those of us in the Young Married Class had a most difficult time moving up to the next age group. Our leaders were always providing something to get us involved with each other.
Posted by: Becky (McCaleb) Fox at October 21, 2008 09:28 PMJoe,
I've noticed something; even in my own thinking about the subject...it's all historical. "Do you remember" seems to dominate stories of fellowship I hear - even my own. Is the church hurting today b/c one of its functions is going by the wayside? We have done at few things at FBC Lanett, AL to address this subject (quarterly birthday parties after church & church picnics), but we've got a LONG way to go. Thanks for making this a priority.
Sometimes fellowship and ministry overlap, or at least ministry to a newcomer paves the way for fellowship and growth in the body of Christ.
When my husband and I joined Calvary in Alexandria, we had a ten-week-old infant and two other children. Two weeks after we joined (when the baby was 3 months old), I had a hysterectomy. The Sunday School class that we had attended exactly three times fed my family for weeks while I was recoverying from major surgery and caring for an infant. Every other day, my doorbell would ring and I would find someone new saying, "Hi, my name is ____________, and here's your dinner."
I would expect a healthy church to take such good care of someone who had been serving in the body for many years, but we were brand new and had not yet contributed anything to service in that particular congregation. The ministry of that Sunday School class, though, formed the foundation for beautiful relationships that continue to grow. A crucial component of fruitful fellowship has to include reaching out to include newcomers -- I'm forever thankful that Calvary in Alexandria knows this.
Posted by: Devona Able at October 28, 2008 03:40 PMI had been attending my church for probably 5 years an I am a part-time staff member. So one would think that I am pretty well comfortable with the church and I was until... Wednesday night dinner, along with my two children tried to set at a table with someone. Although only one seat was taken, we were told that another family sits with her family. Ouch! I went to Wednesday night supper last night and I am still uncomfortable and generally don't go. I wonder how many others have just simply left because they were told something similar.
Posted by: Amanda at November 6, 2008 04:16 PM